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Past Rantings and Ravings
07-29-15 Cecil the Lion
03-04-15 Thank you, Bibi! One less thing for Mikey and I to argue about!
07-03-14 We're back, but not quite
04-17-13 We're supposed to be dead
02-10-12 The real dirt on Obama
06-24-11 Why does it hurt when I email pictures of my Shmuck?
07-17-10 We WATCH FOX SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO
06-29-10 It's not a gaffe, assholes.
02-12-10 Joe's Nigerian Pen pal
02-11-10 A Prayer For Bill Clinton
01-31-10 Terrible Accident
01-29-10 New Blog
12-08-09 December 8 Blog
10-05-09 You Weren't There--The History of Chicago Punk 1977-1984
09-09-09 The Return of Grand Theft Radio to Live365.com
05-05-09 TEABAGGERS BEWARE: LEFTIST LIBERALS WITH FOUL MOUTHS...
02-11-09 Ice Cream flavors for Dubya
02-05-09 Lux Interior passed away.
02-04-09 Mikey Snot impersonations
12-10-08 Open Letter To The Baseball Hall of Fame
10-16-08 Yet Another Reprint
11-15-07 On Vacation in Little Egypt
10-07-07 Blog for the booing broken-hearted Cubs fans
08-04-07 Basement
08-03-07 washington post political compass
08-02-07 Nero, please...
07-23-07 Return of the Rude Truth
07-15-07 Buzz Fugazi at Lost Cross House, 1987
07-13-07 Buzz Fugazi is on vacation.
07-12-07 The Blog Remains The Same part 2
07-11-07 The Blog Remains The Same
06-15-07 Fred Thompson is running for President?
06-07-07 WGTR Buzz Fugazi You Tube
05-17-07 Mango Sex
04-16-07 Bar Mitzva Boy 30 Years Later
03-23-07 Clash of the photo opportunities
03-10-07 1976
03-08-07 Britney Spears Is A Punk Rocker
01-24-07 An Open Apology To The Groodies
12-18-06 We are on the road.
12-05-06 Dialectic with my readers.
11-29-06 An Open Letter from the President of Iran
10-31-06 Trick
or treat? Tangent Man is just saying...
10-30-06 We never were stay the course
10-11-06 Big Streaming Chunks Volume 1
09-13-06 The Unbearable Ambivalence I Feel
07-17-06 Panic In MySpace
06-29-06 The Pentagon Papers
06-15-06 Calling Truce With A Senator
06-14-06 Dear Cyber Pimp...
06-13-06 Professor
Chaos Apologizes To The Peace Rallies Before I Bust A Cap Into His Head
05-18-06 Ian Curtis R.I.P.
05-17-06 How
I Became The Guy Who Wants To Cut All The Trees Down
05-08-06 Chicago punk on MySpace
04-17-06 Professor
Chaos Hates Funeral Protesters From Westboro Baptist Church
04-11-06 Professor Chaos Hates The Peace Rallies
04-05-06 I'm 42, actually
03-25-06 Answer
the fucking question, Mr. President
03-06-06 First line is a default title for poems
02-28-06 Just
wondering:
02-22-06 Random Ambivalent Thoughts...
01-19-06 The New Test To Find Terrorists
12-31-05 Show 8
12-10-05 Jesus. I was there the day he died.
11-11-05 Left and Right Working Together
10-19-05 Not a messianic Jew
09-29-05 Copping a pose in the MSIG Army
09-23-05 Nightmare In Portage Park
08-09-05 Get Your War On by David Rees
07-27-05 MDC
coming in from myspace
07-19-05 Tangent
Man, Part 3
07-16-05 Cult of the Dork
07-13-05 Slow
Train To Blogtown
07-09-05 Big Shmooze
07-07-05 Putting Words In My Mouth
07-06-05 Too Legit To Quit
07-02-05 Ceasefire With GTR
07-01-05 Iraq Now!
06-30-05 Mid-life Crisis?
06-29-05 Tangent Man, Part 2
06-28-05 Tangent Man...
06-27-05 Underground Music Part 2
06-26-05 Satan?
06-25-05 Underground Music
06-24-05 MSIG
BASEMENT BLOG
06-23-05 Glad to be here in the matrix
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| Mango Sex |
May 17, 2007 - Buzz Fugazi
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Houndnews.com lays dormant and unstarted so a sad, bored Leslie Fitzgerald was sitting around the unlit prop set of the BFD Report in the Hound News studio (She's the F. B and D are reportedly on the campaign trail and unavailable for comment).
Working hard or hardly working, I said while strolling toward the DJ lounge in the MSIG ARMY VIP PARTY ROOM where bloggers and punk rockers wash down free meals with the free Open Bar (that's the clue that this is a fantasy sequence).
I was having the Prime Rib a la Snot when Les suddenly materialized at my shoulder. She asked, "When was the last time you wrote a blog?"
I said, "I'll take the Garlic Mashed AND the twice baked!"
"You could write a serious blog," she said. "I could help you with the research. Is there any topic you need hard information about?"
Suddenly, I saw them... two perfect mangos. "What the hell is that?" I asked her pointing to them.
"Looks like fresh mango."
"Mango?"
"MMMMmmmm."
"How do I eat it?"
"Suck the pulp. Chew it. Lick it. Suck on it."
I did and it was incredible. A mango is an amazing thing to suck on. You can chew it and lick it and suck on it and it's juicier than a glass of juice. It's sticky and you get mango all over your face when you dive in the way I did it. It tastes good and it's good for you.
"Hosanna! I think I have a blog topic! Ms. Fitzgerald, if you have the time, could you do me the honor of doing a little internet research for me?"
She consented. No more negative rants against the Bush Administration this time! It's time for something positive! It's time to make a contribution to the BATTLE FOR LOVE!
Google Mango Sex, please.
Is it safe for cunnilingus? If the bits of mango pulp get all up in there, could they get rotten and cause odorific complications? Of all the dreams and nightmares of men, what of this particular vision... the vagina as mango bowl? Can I safely recommend the combination of human mango with the harvested produce by the same name?
Turns out that the combination of mango juice with grape and other juices are part of a 28 day treatment to create mango pussy... or as Ted Nugent might say if he weren' t too busy stalking wildlife with bow and arrow: mango mango.
I'd get off the boat and go into the jungle for some mango.
This could be something divine for men who love giving face to women. Or it could be dangerous and unhealthy. Does the mango mango treatment really work? All I know is that mango is an awesome snack. And so is mango. And for all you gay guys out there who feel excluded from this blog, there's the old Saturday Night Live skit about the male exotic dancer in gold shorts who innocently jolts men out of the closet. That and the list of other successful combinations of fruit and meat.
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