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Mikey Snot Is Great
Glad to be here in the matrix

Thursday June 23, 2005, Buzz Fugazi

I'm plugged in and it's great. I'm not here to tell you how it ends. I'm here to tell you how it begins. Some of you wanks who came in and out of the C-dale '80s-'90s scene may remember my angry satirical political cultural snob rag: BASEMENT. Yeah, me and my staff were the smug smart kids who understood that the only goal in life is to rule the earth by getting one cool bean and three shells (a left, center, and a right). We knew we were supposed to hide the bean, juggle the shells while we made smiling distracting jokes, and then grab the money and make the suckers weep.

Some of the highest ideals of journalism went into that project and I want to bring the same integrity to the MSIG ARMY: Our truth is more useful. Our lies are more fun. Aside from giving you a good wank to relieve the stress of your day, I want us to work together like hippies singing "I'd love to teach the world to sing" in an old Coke commercial. I think we should seize power for fun and profit. Let's mobilize, organize, see our enemies driven before us, hear the lamentations of their women, throw a party, build nuclear power plants and nuclear dump-sites on every block.